2010

Wow..... it is 2010.

That is insane! This means that I am going to be 30 this year. I will have been married for 10 years. I will be 30~ Did I mention that I will be 30?

Small midlife crisis. You know how it is. For whatever reason, just because you can't have kids? It does not mean that your baby clock stops ticking. This sucks. It means that I have to constantly remind myself that I cannot have babies. It is OK that I am almost 30 with no kids. I am not behind. I AM OK!!!!! Weird conversations happen in this brain sometimes.

SO, 2009. What a year.

Some key points, good and bad:

• Finally started healing from a lot of hurts. This came with a really hard year where a lot of things finally reared their ugly heads and made me notice them.
• Went to an amazing conference in Laguna Beach called "Ultimate Leadership". Amazing. Helped the above start!
• Found out that I am stronger than I thought and that God has not completely abandoned me! HE ACTUALLY LOVES THIS SCREWED UP PERSON!!!
• Made some really good new friends. This was a good thing this year and really needed. And these are not just surface friends. Some of them are turning into really deep friends that I hope are around for a long time.
• Things at my business went a lot better.
• I started really enjoying cooking again.
• Went on a few trips. Terrace (twice), Banff (twice), Las Vegas, Edmonton, Calgary and a few other little trips to visit family. Had a blast on all of them.

This was a year full of struggles, including losing my job recently, and triumphs. I am really looking forward to 2010. I am going to make it a good year. I am going to work hard at my business and watch it grow, I am going to love me and my body, I am going to love Husband a lot more, I am going to keep my house cleaner and cook more and just spent time with me and friends and stop caring what other people think. I will probably not do much travelling (due to loss of job) and I will probably not plant as many flowers or shop as much. I will lead a simpler life and I am going to learn to love it. It is a challenge to me that I am actually looking forward to. I am still at a friends house. We have been here for two weeks. We are loving it. In two days, we will start our trek home. This year is going to include a lot of changes and a lot of interesting things that we will deal with as they come. This will be a good year.

And I will be turning 30.