I don't even know how to write this.
My dad broke his neck. Yes he did. He is being rushed to Vancouver to have neck surgery on Thursday.
Can I just say WTF!!! Between this and my grandpa I am starting to wonder. Who is next? Does it really come in 3's? I just want to get in my car and go there and see everyone. Be a support. But I can't. And I know that. I am furious with Husband for saying that I can't (he knows it is not mentally healthy and that I am just falling back into my old patterns) but know that he is right. Still makes me mad though.
I have spent the last 12 years of my life as a care giver. I have a kind hear and just want to fix it for everyone. I think though that people take advantage of me because of it. It also stops people from stepping up to the plate and figuring it out. It is really easy to just wait for me to do it. I am not doing myself or anyone else any favours though and so here I sit. Far away. And going crazy :( I know that I need this boundary in my life. It does not mean that I would not go if they asked. But that is different than just going and doing. Does this make any sense?
So I will focus on my business and my house and I will just let them figure it out. I will be here for everyone and will go down for when I was supposed to but for now? I am here. And I am going to paint my house. I have decided that my bedroom and my wall in the living room will be painted by the end of the weekend. I am going to go buy tape tomorrow and I am going to start taping. I am sure that Husband will not be happy but I need to do it. I just need to. He will survive. He is now home tomorrow night so maybe he will help???
I need to head to bed. I have not had more than 4 hours of sleep a night since Sunday. Yuck.
Goodnight world.
And can you please pray for my dad that there are no complications with surgery and that he heals fast?
Thanks.
3 comments:
You know you have my prayers.
And the husband is right, you'll just go there, sit around and take care of everyone for lack of anything else to do. There isn't much you can do - wait for his surgery, go when it's time. And paint! that's an excellent distraction.
You are in my prayers, hugs.
If your life was a movie people would say it wasn't realistic... " That couldn't possibly happen to one person!" Just remember what I said about stark raving mad and realise that you are doing GREAT in comparison! Love you! Your Dad is on the prayer chain and don't think about # 3 happening! You have enough to think about with out it!
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